Am I asking for too much?

This is a question that I struggle with on a daily basis. Am I asking too much from the guy I'm talking to? Am I asking too much from my friends? Are my expectations too high? And to be honest the answer is I don't know. Truthfully, because I feel like all the things I ask from people I would do for them or to just help them. I can tell you this though, I was speaking to one of my mentors and she told me, "No, you are never asking for too much in your relationships."

I think for me, I am just incredibly loyal and always ready to be there for my friends that it just gets frustrating sometimes when I don't get the same in return. But, that is just who I am as a person and should I expect everyone to be just like me. Definitely not, but it's gets annoying always being the person that is constantly available and is always there. Because, now it's just expected I feel like. Like "Adedayo is always free." And that isn't a bad thing, I just want to be busy sometimes. Or have a situation where I might put my man first. I don't know, I know that sounds horrible. But honestly, you can ask any of my friends I will probably never put my man before my friends. I just feel like my friends have always been there and they're in some form my family, and you never leave your family. So, I will never be the girl that switches up when I get a boyfriend. Which makes it so frustrating for me when my friends switch up when they get a boyfriend. Like I would never. And that is when that magical question comes back into my head: Am I asking for too much? But asking for my friend to be there or hang out with me or do me a favor is never too much. Then comes the question: Are we out growing each other? I seriously haven't gone through out growing a friendship until right now. I'm officially a college graduate, and I have to think about the people I'm going to keep around. Ya know? Like if you, or actually we, couldn't make the friendship work when we were down the street from each other, how is it gonna work when we are miles away and living in different time zones? I can't be the only one calling or putting in effort. Which is kind of how I was feeling, when everything started happening with this friendship. Growing up is sooooo weird. Soooo weird. My friend said she was moving to Houston, and I thought that was so crazy. Actually, though, it isn't. We're starting our lives. Different topic, but I don't remember ever thinking it was gonna be this hard.

And then when I am always asking myself this question is when I am dating. So, I am currently single, and of course I want a boyfriend. I just cannot settle. I literally don't even know her. Sometimes I wish I did, just so I can get some play, but honestly I don't. And this is something I struggle with and why dating is so hard for me. I genuinely don't think I'm asking for that much, but just show that you care. And if we are a situationship, so be it. Just let me know. All I'm asking for is honesty. But in this generation that seems impossible. Everyone wants to have their cake and eat it too. That's not how life works, but I mean maybe that's how it works for some people. No one wants to care too much. Which leaves me coming off as the girl who does too much or wants too much or is the girlfriend type. I mean yes, I am the girlfriend type, but also I can be the fun type. I just want some respect. And I don't ever think respect is too much to ask for.

So, I do not have the answer to this question. But I do think if I would do it for you, then it isn't too much to ask for. Honesty, should be guarantee. And just being there for someone should just be what you do because you're a good person. So maybe I'm not asking for too much, and maybe it's just the people in my life who aren't right. Just some food for thought, I guess.

As always thank you for your time.

xoxo

Adedayo